The Tampa Bay Buccaneers plan to unleash new uniforms for 2020. Will they be an improvement over what they currently have or will they get even weirder?
Fire the cannons, baby! The Tampa Bay Buccaneers will have new uniforms in 2020.
And thank God. The Buccaneers have arguably the worst uniforms in the NFL and that includes whatever the hell the Jacksonville Jaguars are doing or have done over the last half-decade. There’s just something about Florida, I suppose.
On Wednesday afternoon, the Buccaneers released a hype video about them getting new threads. Hopefully, it’ll bring a swift end to the red-alert alarm clock digits they’ve been rocking perpetually out of the playoff picture. This is a day to celebrate, Buccaneers fans and denizens of the Tampa.
Throughout their 40-plus years as an NFL franchise, the Buccaneers have had three uniforms of note. Of course, we’re talking about the Bucco Bruce creamsicles that best encapsulates expansion-era offensive futility and Lee Roy Selmon excellence on the defensive side of the ball. If this uniform doesn’t prominently feature creamsicle, then everybody should be fired.
The other major color of note often associated is pewter. These threads symbolize the glory days from the Tony Dungy and the Jon Gruden eras. Pewter reminds us of defensive domination from Warren Sapp, Derrick Brooks, John Lynch Ronde Barber and Simeon Rice, Mike Alstott being the greatest fullback of the 2000s and Keyshawn Johnson just wanting the damn ball thrown his way.
So if the Buccaneers proudly display new threads in a sweet, delicious pewter-y creamsicle swirl, then we’re all winners here. The Buccaneers’ three colors on this uniform better be creamsicle, pewter and white. That’s it. None of this please-take-us-seriously crimson nonsense. Own creamsicle and pewter and we’ll respect it how the Miami Dolphins own teal and orange.
No, Tampa Bay won’t be the first NFL franchise undergoing a wholesale uniform change this offseason. The Buccaneers’ NFC South rival in the Atlanta Falcons announced they’re changing threads a few weeks back. The Dirty Birds need red helmets as bad as the Buccaneers need creamsicle and pewter draped all over their bodies. It’s who they are, people! Own it, Tampa!
Ultimately, we can’t reasonably expect the Glazers to get it right. Frankly, they haven’t gotten a lot of things right since firing Gruden. We think the Buccaneers have the right head coach for the time being in the aging Bruce Arians. Go get yourself a quarterback who isn’t a reckless gunslinger like Brett Favre and dress him up in something really nice, just as long as it’s creamsicle and pewter.