Dak Prescott, Dallas Cowboys. (Photo by Tom Pennington/Getty Images)
Everyone in the United States has heard of social distancing. Unfortunately, the Dallas Cowboys aren’t huge believers in it, and neither is Dez Bryant.
Why stand six feet apart when you can be six inches apart?
This seems to be the thinking of Dallas Cowboys quarterback Dak Prescott, former Cowboys receiver — and current free agent — Dez Bryant and the three others in their workout on Thursday afternoon.
With the country in the midst of a public health crisis like we haven’t seen in 100 years, Prescott and Bryant were making sure to get work in. The COVID-19 guidelines of staying six feet away from people? Not today.
This might explain why the Cowboys needed a new coach. Maybe Mike McCarthy will explain to his quarterback how much six feet is. You know, like 72 inches and stuff. Jason Garrett clearly wasn’t breaking out the math lessons at the complex.
The Cowboys went 8-8 last year with one of the game’s most-talented rosters. In a division that included the Washington Redskins, New York Giants and the Philadelphia Eagles, the latter of whom dealt with approximately 486 season-ending injuries in October alone.
Of course, we’re kidding … mostly. At some point, people not taking social distancing seriously during the worst American pandemic in a century is a major problem. From a football standpoint, the Cowboys didn’t make the playoffs because they choked in Philadelphia against the Eagles, and their coaching was borderline criminal.
Still, taking direction might be a bit of a problem if you can’t stay two yards away from someone in these troubling times.